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Goodness Gracious Me

The British TV show, "Goodness Gracious Me," has a one liner sketch where the guy says rude thing to the woman at the restaurant. The woman always leaves the restaurant and the guy says "Cheque please." It was a big hit back in High School. So here are somethings you shouldn't say when you are on the date. (Or here's something you could say if you must must must must finish your date immediately... I encourage you not to tho). Why post these? well, just for a fun. Enjoy. oh and check out "Goodness Gracious Me" on youtube. They're hilarious.

Man: Er... why don't we skip desert and get out of here?
Woman: Why? what do you have in mind?
Man: Nothing. It's just that you are already fat, innit??

Man: So you must all be models, right?
Women: hahaha... What makes you say that?
Man: Well, it's because you are all thick, innit??
(thick=british slang for dumb, stupid)

Waiter: A rose for the woman you love?
Man: oh thats a good idea!
(woman smiles)
Man: Because I'll be back here after I drop you off, innit??

(waiter brings the menu)
Man: hey, I could see you like the seafood. Am I right?
Woman: Yes how did you know?
Man: I could tell as soon as I picked you up.
(woman smiles)
Woman: how?
Man: because you smell of fish, innit??

Man: It's appauling. Women shouldn't be pressured to be thin and do their hair and have the right nose and that.
Woman: Oh, gosh! Absolutely. I agree!
Man: See that's one of the great thing about you!!
(Woman smiles)
Man: You make no effort at all!!

Man: Even though we've just met, I feel I already know many things about you.
Woman: (chuckles) why do you think that is?
Man: Because I've been watching you through telescopes for months, innit??

Man: Your parents must be really beautiful people.
Woman: Ah, thank you.
Man: because it often skips a generation, innit??

Man: It's not like India. It's like, in this country when you get old, they lock them up and exclude them from society. I don't agree with that... That's why I'm with you, innit??

(Man returns from the bathroom)
Man: Allow me.
(Man help the woman take her last bite of food)
Woman: hmm... thank you. You are back. You were gone for ages. I thought you ran off with another woman.
Man: That's because I was having a d**p (#2), innit??